Minister’s Letter 12/1/2024
Dear Friends,
Some of you may be thinking to yourself, please don’t tell us anymore about how you love Christmas music. Alas, you are out of luck. While you may find yourself as someone who holds your ears closed as they play monotonous Christmas music in Walgreens for everyone to be subjected to, you might find me bopping along in the line in front of you or behind you. To be honest, I used to be embarrassed by how much I enjoy Christmas music. Despite the fact that it is everywhere, the general consensus around me has always been that Christmas music was too much, too present, too soon, and simply too annoying. My little non-Christian, non-theist, Unitarian Universalist heart though, it sings along with every word. I have one friend who recently told me that he is able to hate Christmas music less because he knows that I’m off somewhere taking great joy in it.
This reflection from my friend feels very much like a Unitarian Universalist value to me. This friend of mine is not UU, and this idea that we can find pleasure in the pleasure of others, that is something we have talked about at our church before. I hope this does not feel redundant, it feels worth repeating quite regularly. As a theologically pluralistic community it is our responsibility to honor that those in the chairs around us may be getting their spiritual needs met by something that may not be specifically meeting our own. It is one thing to have patience or even tolerance for this reality. We might even accept that not everything at church is going to speak to us. It is simply the nature of Unitarian Universalism. The invitation, however, is to move beyond patience, tolerance, or acceptance and try on a practice of feeling spiritually fulfilled, or emotionally/intellectually fulfilled, by the knowledge that the person sitting next to you, behind you, or in front of you might be getting their vital needs met by something which does not speak to you.
If we recognize that we are all profoundly interconnected, as our values teach us, then those in our community who are experiencing a sense of nurtured spirit from a ritual, song, sermon we are all participating in, that is beautiful even if it is not speaking similarly to you. You could see this as a kind of UU radical acceptance. You could imagine it as one piece of our interconnected web of existence being attended to with care. It is the act of practicing the opposite of jealousy, some people call it compersion, one of my favorite words.
I am not trying to pretend that this is an easy practice. When not getting my needs met, I can get irritated, frustrated, and annoyed. This is especially true when I am participating in a worship service. I need to be fed, feed me. If the service never met your needs, this practice would not be sustainable. If you never felt spiritually nourished, big changes would be needed. The point I am offering is that there will be times each week, each month, each year where something might not exactly be right for you, but it is right for someone else. Our faith invites us to embrace that practice of compersion and choose to feel spiritually fulfilled by the knowledge that others are getting their needs met. I am saying it again, but I am hoping it is feeling clear.
And so, maybe my love of Christmas music is a bit silly (and inconsistent with my theology) but it fills me with joy in a world that can use a little more joy. I hope that I can celebrate you finding the joy you need in this season and the many seasons to come.
In faithful solidarity,
